“At midnight I had always been metamorphosed into a solitary, estranged wanderer.”
— Anaïs Nin
At midnight the mask comes off and I stand so naked that I am unseen. Unseen by the expectations of the day people I can be more truly myself and get lost in my shadows for hours with no fear of expectation. The freedom is welcomed even if it is a solitary pursuit for any companion in my wanderings will project a mask on even the most naked of faces comprised of who they have known me to be and even more odious who they wished me to be that I were not. In the morning world, I wake to my day life and the layers and layers of motley and machier form upon me but the night’s wind never wholly disappears.
” No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit. ”
Create with me
a reality based on our dreams
A many faceted gem that exists
at the touch of our souls.
We’ll shape the pieces anew
and watch them form
I’ll manifest the you that you wish
as I become the me I envision
It doesn’t matter who we are
as long as we are true
to our self to our dreams
and to the expression of our wills.
— G A Rosenberg
“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.”
― Brené Brown
Who do I want to be in this world? How can my actions reflect my true inner self? Only I can control this. If I pass the reign to others, then I surrender myself. If I act or refrain from acting because I am worried about the response than I become something lesser. Authenticity is addictive. The more we act as ourselves, the easier it becomes to do so. The more we compromise ourselves, the easier that becomes as well and it is a slippery slope that leads to all forms of distress both physically and emotionally.
Out in plain sight
yet hidden from view
my lyrical soul
shines out at you
Most tho can’t see me
what a surprise
Their eyes have been veiled
by the weight of the lies
society tells us
what we can view
follow the media
to know what to do.
Schools will mould us
towards the way we ‘should’ be
we gladly dawn the chains
to avoid being free
So we avoid looking
at our own honest souls
Hidden, not hidden
stuffed in their holes
“A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a quip and worried to death by a frown on the right man’s brow.”
What do the words choice, responsibility, authenticity, and fate mean to you? At a personal level?
Choice- Something I make every moment of every day.
I am responsible and accountable for the choices I make and their consequences. I may bitch about the results all I want. I can rationalize how my choices were inevitable given my upbringing, my culture etc yet especially at the point of life I am at now. I am responsible for recognizing how much each of those things play into my choices.
Fate is the pattern of our lives. It is the path of least resistance and can be altered.
The more my choices and words reflect my true self, beyond influences of my past or my culture or even my mood, the more I am being authentic.
There is a word in there that you missed, – Accountable.
It is close to responsibility but not quite the same.
When we screw up our choices for any of the above reasons, we still have to say “I screwed up” and try to make it right if possible or at least own up to it. We can’t merely hide it away or blame it on ways we have been abused etc. These are our choices. We have made them. To blame them on anyone or anything else is to give away our power.
“The roots of language are irrational and of a magical nature.”
— Jorge Luis Borges
“Determined will is the beginning of all magical operations. It is because men do not perfectly imagine and believe the result, that the (occult) arts are so uncertain, while they might be perfectly certain.”
According to wikipedia, “In the dramatic arts, method acting is a group of techniques actors use to create in themselves the thoughts and feelings of their characters, so as to develop lifelike performances.” Yet how often in life do we act as our true selves? Too often it seems that we spend so much time worrying about the effect of our words and actions that they become more of an expression of how we wish to be perceived and not who we are. Even that tends to change depending on whom our perceived audience maybe.
I would play my true being and self consistently in all the moments of my life. Even more I would play the person I wish to be, unfettered by the expectations of others or the emotional dross and baggage that make up so much of my actions and reactions, Perhaps by adopting the form of my true self I could become my idealized self and thus become the stage for future becomings.
“I want to write a novel about silence. The things people don’t say.”
— Virginia Woolf
Some of us talk enough to fill volumes. We expound on so many different topics and fill the air around us with words. Yet so many of them are empty. We refrain from saying what’s really going on inside. When it comes to being vulnerable, we become silent at best. By this, I don’t necessarily mean that we don’t show emotion. I could talk for hours about things that make me weepy or make me angry. Those things for many are merely the scab with which we cover our wounds. So often when we cry or rage, we are not doing it about the topics that really matter. More often it means that someone has come close to a vulnerable area and we are desperately holding up signs that say “Here there be dragons” in the hope either that someone will either back off. Perhaps we have a greater hope that they won’t and that they can whether the emotional smokescreen to expose the injury beneath and thus offer healing. Yet we pull back and hold those areas in silence. Yes our speech may fill volumes but our silences can fill buildings.
“Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”
— Franz Kafka
The song of my own styling
is a rainbow in the dark
full of broken colours
and long roads
The melody does not sustain
and harmonies are rare
yet there’s magic in the lyrics
I hear it when I’m sleeping
and sing it to the dawn
Its carried in my backpack
and my heart
It’s a sad and joyous tune
a riddle and a plan
yet there are parts
even I don’t understand
yet it holds me in the dark
and it sings me under cloudy skies.
— G A Rosenberg
“Plant a garden in which strange plants grow and mysteries bloom.”
― Ken Kesey
Lose your fear of being different
Dance to your drummer’s beat
no matter how different and strange.
Live in the garden of your own design
and nourish the plants that no one has seen before
Let them grow wild and free
as your dreams dark and mysterious.
Be concerned only with the ways you conform
that are not you.
The things you are for others
that are not your true self.
Those are the weeds in your garden.
Roll naked in your tall grasses
and invite others to make love under your stars
Embrace your strange universe
in the knowledge it is singular
Feel the joy of who you are.
— G A Rosenberg
“No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit.”
— Ansel Adams
I stand naked before the court
exposed before my self
judge and jury watch
as I accuse and defend my being
Here is my ignorance
and my indifference to cries
I pretended not to hear
Here is my fear
that excuse for inauthenticity
Here my sense of beauty
and my kindness
Here my concern and my thoughts
I drone on for hours
ripping off the layers of my being
more revealed with each word
until finally I am exhausted
A feather hovers in the air
and my sentence delivered.
With new clarity I go forth.
— G A Rosenberg