Tag Archives: helping

Learning How to Help

 

“The place to improve the world is first in one’s own heart and head and hands, and then work outward from there.”
— Robert M. Pirsig

 

So many people
want to live the way they do.
Train wrecks in motion
not caring what comes through
They feel entitled
to live their life their way
but when it falls apart
you can hear them say

 

Rescue me but don’t save me
Prove to me you care
Don’t help me walk, carry me
Please come ease my fears.

 

I’ve made some choices
that landed me in the rough
put myself in places
that taught me to get tough
I’ve had some people
who have brought me to my feet
gave me some pointers
to make myself complete.

 

Taking advantage
would have felt kind of sleazy
Blaming the world
felt a bit too easy.
I had to find
a way that worked for me
to face the mirror
responsibility

 

Save me but don’t rescue me
point out ways to go
trust that I’ll get there
Learn how much I know

 

I try hard not to be judge people. I know how rough many people have it and we are all products of our past and unique. Living in this world costs and living in this world consciously can take its toll no matter how joyous aspects of it can be.
There have been times when I’ve needed help and people were there for me, family, friends and wondrous strangers who’s memory I bless. More often than not tho, they didn’t help me with money but with opportunities to put my life back together. I had to hold up my end and actually do the work. Some of those opportunities I screwed up and found myself in as rough shape as before. In some of those cases, I tried blaming the people who helped me, accusing them in my mind of setting me up to fail. Luckily in most of those cases I started laughing at myself, realizing that they actually had more confidence in me than I had in myself. Eventually I learned.
It’s a special gift to know how to be there for others. It’s easy to give money to friends rather than help them self-actualize. I would rather help them find that spark of self-esteem that will help them much more.
Blessings, G

 

Click on images to see full-sized:

 

Dryads Tree DancingTree Dancing (Dryads) by G A Rosenberg

 

Fox's Starry NightFox’s Starry Night by G A Rosenberg

 

Responding to Need

“The true measure of a man is not his intelligence or how high he rises in this freak establishment. No, the true measure of a man is this: how quickly can he respond to the needs of others and how much of himself he can give.”
― Philip K. Dick

 

There is a gift in being able to be there for others. Part of it may be an ego thing. It feels good to help. The trick sometimes is in knowing how to help. An alcoholic may appreciate money for booze when he has none but are you giving him what he needs or are you increasing his dependency? We give true help when what we do empowers another rather than makes them weaker. It seems so often that its easy to give a quick fix. Heck it takes less time than actually helping a person work through their problems. So often tho, we could help so much more by not opening our wallet but opening our hearts and our ears and learning what will truly benefit another. Perhaps it is a job offer, perhaps it is just a sounding board and sometimes it is knowing when not to help so that another can find their own way out.
I have helped in the wrong ways. I have learned that generosity with money all too often can foster dependency and resentment. I want to strengthen others with my help not weaken them. I hope to be strengthened by others in return.
Blessings, G

 

Click on images to see full-sized:

 

BroadcastingBroadcasting by G A Rosenberg

 

Weaving Outside of the FrameOutside of the Frame by G A Rosenberg