“What could I say to you that would be of value, except that perhaps you seek too much, that as a result of your seeking you cannot find.”
― Hermann Hesse
Looking too hard for answers.
Lost in the trees
with no forest in sight.
Trying to hard for achievement
looking to make myself right.
I waste so much time on becoming
that I forget just how to be.
Losing myself in the seeking
Could I find myself in the me
Letting it all go
Letting it all flow
Hitting that zero sport
Untying the frayed knot
Throwing my hands up in the air
Caring so much that I don’t care
Reaching that point of surrender
My spirt now can be rendered
— G A Rosenberg
“Dreams and restless thoughts came flowing to him from the river, from the twinkling stars at night, from the sun’s melting rays. Dreams and a restlessness of the soul came to him.”
― Hermann Hesse
Restless visions
of places only imagined
take me away
from the meaningless drama around me.
So much matter and so little matters
yet others seem to live for drama
I live for explorations
trying to scrape meaning
from the pieces scattered across
lines a thousand miles across.
Is there meaning in your body next to mine
or in the stars
or in the places you dare not go?
Words seem to echo
drops in the silence well
yet my restless soul moves on,
— G A Rosenberg
“I have always believed, and I still believe, that whatever good or bad fortune may come our way we can always give it meaning and transform it into something of value.”
― Hermann Hesse
I take the dross of pain and joy
I plan to weave tonight
Decomposing experience
putrefying by the wayside
waiting to see what may arise
out of the decay
I weave the remains
a golden thread
in which I shall cloak myself
with understanding
as compassion is born
for those whom it may fit.
Each night I weave
yearning for something pure
yet they still can’t guess my name.
— G A Rosenberg
“Every man is more than just himself; he also represents the unique, the very special and always significant and remarkable point at which the world’s phenomena intersect, only once in this way, and never again. That is why every man’s story is important, eternal, sacred; that is why every man, as long as he lives and fulfills the will of nature, is wondrous, and worthy of consideration. In each individual the spirit has become flesh, in each man the creation suffers, within each one a redeemer is nailed to the cross.”
― Hermann Hesse
Aleister Crowley in the Book of the Law said it. “Every man and every woman is a star.” Among other things this means to me that we are each unique and capable of expressing something that no one else can express. Oh our energy may incarnate in other times and other places but in this time, in this place with this energy we are unique. What is it that we are meant to express? Most of us spend our lives working at discovering this. Eventually we catch on to the fact that whether or not we do it consciously, whether or not we do it well, we are always expressing our uniqueness. Oh it is easy especially in this 21st century here-now to pretend to be someone or something other but ultimately we become ourselves. Our masks slip away. I don’t know that I would have it any other way.
Blessings, G
“You should not take old people who are already dead seriously. It does them injustice. We immortals do not like things to be taken seriously. We like joking. Seriousness, young man, is an accident of time. It consists, I don’t mind telling you in confidence, in putting too high a value on time. I, too, once put too high a value on time. For that reason I wished to be a hundred years old. In eternity, however, there is no time, you see. Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke.”
— Hermann Hesse
In the pool of eternity laughter echoes. Oh the humour may be slightly black and the joke is often on us. We are quite comical you know. A given moment of rudeness from a stranger can ruin a day or a week for us. From the long view it is inconsequential but the majority of us must look like either beasts raging for no reason over things that a few time ticks later won’t matter at all. Still by that time we will find something else to unleash our Daffy Duck tempers against, equally as inconsequential. From the longview even things fairly major that might cause months of depression must seem like small potatoes. After all ten years down the road, chances are our lives look totally different where joy exists and yet we get so stuck in our present woes. Would that we could gain either the eternal view of our dramatic moments from outside time or even more the view from outside space where we can see our situation in relation to others who have it much worse. Those others always exist somewhere in space, somewhere in time.
Blessings, G
” Who would be born must first destroy a world.”
—Hermann Hesse
I choose a new world of being and leave the old one in flames.The old me died of realized misconceptions and took his world with him. What is a world but an outlook, a way of seeing that crystallizes around belief and cracks when the belief changes. No world I’m in ever stays around too long for I was fostered by the phoenix and the flame will never die.
Blessings, G
“Wisdom cannot be imparted. Wisdom that a wise man attempts to impart always sounds like foolishness to someone else … Knowledge can be communicated, but not wisdom. One can find it, live it, do wonders through it, but one cannot communicate and teach it.”
— Hermann Hesse
Wisdom is an elusive thing at best. It is not something that time gives you (would that it were). There are people of all ages who still insist on being grounded in their own unrecognized ignorance. It’s not something that can be given at all tho it is something that can accumulate around one. Wisdom is not a constant, often there are those who are wise in somethings at sometimes and foolish in others. The most important thing about wisdom that I’ve learned is that it is not something that anyone can claim for themselves, it is something that only another or others can recognize. I have an inherent mistrust of anyone who calls themselves wise. Tho I do believe we can often find wisdom in the words of another,even if the words are spoken by a fool.
Blessings, G
“My real self wanders elsewhere, far away, wanders on and on invisibly and has nothing to do with my life.”
— Hermann Hesse
I read the above quote and wonder whether it is true for everyone. Are most of us truly that divorced from our true selves (whether we wish to call it our souls or our Holy Guardian Angel or any other choice of metaphor.) I know that there have been times in my life when I have felt the presence of my true self, that part of me that connects to the greater spiritual universe. I also know that having had a taste of it, I have attempted to live my life in such a way that I could connect with it again and as often as possible with some moderate success. Granted this is not easy and so much of life does seem divorced from the touch of that higher being and yet the more I reach it whether through meditation, magick, yoga or creativity the more my life takes on truer hue and colour and the more I abandon those parts of my life where I feel unable to touch it at all. For if my real self does travel elsewhere than that is the direction I wish to travel in myself.
Blessings, G
“What I am in search of is not so much the gratification of a curiosity or a passion for worldly life, but something far less conditional. I do not wish to go out into the world with an insurance policy in my pocket guaranteeing my return in the event of a disappointment, like some cautious traveller who would be content with a brief glimpse of the world. On the contrary, I desire that there should be hazards, difficulties and dangers to face; I am hungry for reality, for tasks and deeds, and also for privation and suffering.”
— Hermann Hesse
Things to do when you’re daring (getting out of the comfort zone):
Live in a strange city or country for a time. Extra points if the language spoken there is not your own or one you know
Take any viewpoint that you have held on to whether it is moral, political or religious and try presenting yourself as believing the opposite even to yourself. This will help change your mindset.
Spend time with the elderly if you are young or with teenagers if you are getting up there in years.
Dress in a totally different style then you’re use to and go out. Notice how people react to you. How do you feel different?
Explore your sexuality
Camp out in the woods for a week. Especially if you have never done it before.
Think of the last three people who hurt you badly. Make an active attempt to see where they were coming from.
Think of the worse thing you have ever done in your life and forgive yourself.
Adopt a different culture or social class for a week
Tell someone you love how you feel about them. There are very few times when we’re more open and vulnerable than that.
Remember that life is a banquet with lots to offer and most people only eat from one small area. Try to do one thing every day that you have never done before.
“Whither will my path yet lead me? This path is stupid, it goes in spirals, perhaps in circles, but whichever way it goes, I will follow it.”
— Hermann Hesse
Ghosts of old newscasters and older deceased novelists whisper to me “And so it goes”.
Statuses on Facebook reporting that most politicians are clones but they don’t say of whom or why it should matter. And so it goes.
Other voices telling me how this religion is evil and should be stopped. Of course most of the ones saying it believe that the beliefs they have are the right ones ignoring its dubious history.
And so it goes.
I hear the government is not out for the interests of its people but its own.
And so it goes
This seems to be true of most governments … and most corporations.. and most people and so it goes.
Most everything we put in or on our bodies is unhealthy for us not to mention the air we breathe and the water we drink
And so it goes.
There is a diet that will allow us to live healthier, longer and happier lives. There are a variety of opinions of what this diet is. And so it goes.
Most people seem to need to believe that they are right and everyone else is wrong. And so it goes.
Still like flowers or weeds we grow, pushing up through the cracks, surviving as long as we can the footsteps and anything else that may uproot us. We may have things stunting our growth but still we survive as long as we can and find the moments of joy and pleasure and peace we can and somehow within each of our lives there is growth despite or perhaps because of everything that comes our way.
And so it goes.
Blessings, G