Tag Archives: higher self

More Random Notes

I surrender myself to myself
perennial life student learning from many

I surrender myself to love.

Committing to my inner truth and expressing it… A surprising challenge…one that i believe i’m open to..
it is happening..

The universe tends to send me recurring messages. Over a period of two to three days everywhere I turn I will hear a message repeated. Messages such as the importance of personal integrity or the need to express my truth. When I say the universe, I believe I mean my higher self or soul, if you will. Most recently the message that I kept getting was to know what I want. “Ask and ye shall receive.” Have clear intentions and they will happen. I have always found this to be true. What I kept reading, hearing in random videos on YouTube or in conversations with friends or even in music was that I had to want something. The challenge is that basically I love the universe’s infinite capacity to surprise me. Things consistently turn out either better than I could ever wish, or stranger or both. So thinking about what I really wanted I found rather difficult.
So I put some thought into it and meditated a bit and started writing down what I felt I wanted:

I want the world to grow up…

I want us to mature as a people. to treat the planet better .. to form new systems of government that actually work for the people..to restructure society from the beginning

I want to love unconditionally and universally..
I want to channel and act from my higher self

I wish to serve a higher purpose. My soul’s purpose if you will.. To serve source..To serve man but in the non cookbook sense..
When these wants become needs then things will flow…I want to need these things with every fiber of my being…

I believe the difference between wants and needs is compromise.. When we want something, we want it NOW. We want it how we want i, where we want it and will not find anything else acceptable. When we need something however, we need it and will take it anyway we can get it. A starving man will eat just about anything he can find if it will sustain him..An addict will make any compromise to get what he needs..
Understanding in any given situation whether something may be a want or a need for us seems to me to be an important part of the maturation process

I need an enema of expression. seems like my truth is hiding behind my nonsense and i need to free it

memory of talent yearning, burning, churning
learning still yet not stilled
agitate cogitate meditate not medicate
translate the meaning don’t let lessons be tossed
lost, seeking to find
needing to rewind and grind
never mind all that
my years gone into arrears
so many of them flown
chances blown
new ones arrive
count on it
no obit waiting for me
no end to forsee
i keep going
spiralling out
new iterations
new complications
tempestuous temptations
yet still
through use of will
I find the chill
always and all ways