“Much of magic as I understand it in the Western occult tradition is the search for the Self, with a capital S. This is understood as being the Great Work, as being the gold the alchemists sought, as being the Will, the Soul, the thing we have inside us that is behind the intellect, the body, the dreams. The inner dynamo of us, if you like. Now this is the single most important thing that we can ever attain, the knowledge of our own Self. And yet there are a frightening amount of people who seem to have the urge not just to ignore the Self, but actually seem to have the urge to obliterate themselves. This is horrific, but you can almost understand the desire to simply wipe out that awareness, because it’s too much of a responsibility to actually posses such a thing as a soul, such a precious thing. What if you break it? What if you lose it? Mightn’t it be best to anesthetize it, to deaden it, to destroy it, to not have to live with the pain of struggling towards it and trying to keep it pure? I think that the way that people immerse themselves in alcohol, in drugs, in television, in any of the addictions that our culture throws up, can be seen as a deliberate attempt to destroy any connection between themselves and the responsibility of accepting and owning a higher Self and then having to maintain it.”
— Alan Moore
There is something inside of us that calls to us no matter how hard we resist. We can drink, do drugs, watch violent movies and sports, treat each other like shit yet still even when we try to quiet our inner self it speaks out. Perhaps it is in acts of self-sabatoge as that inner self tries to rouse us from our self-induced slumber. Perhaps we have an experience where for just a second we are connected to that higher self and know beyond mere belief that what we have been running from all this time is both fierce and beautiful. It may be just the right conversation at just the right time that does it but few of us can resist it when it happens. For at least a brief time we wake up knowing that there is something more to strive for. Tho we may choose to hit the snooze button and return to our slumber, once heard that voice cannot be fully ignored.
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