Just Stories?

 

“Just stories. You and me, everybody, we’re a set of stories and what those stories are is what makes us what we are.”
“It’s all those stories and how they braid together that tells us who and what and where we are”
— Charles de Lint

 

The stories that we tell ourselves about our lives are amazing. We write ourselves as heroes or victims and then go on living the roles that we have created. If the stories we tell of our lives are unhappy ones than we go on living unhappy lives. If the stories we tell are of fulfilment and joy than that is what we live. What happens tho if we change the story we tell? What if we take the unhappiest chapter of our life and reframe it as a valuable lesson learned that brought us joy? What happens if we take that one thing we always blamed ourselves for and change it so that while we accept the responsibility for our reactions, we accept that we were living according to who we were at the time and it wasn’t our fault.
When it comes right down to it, very little in our lives is our fault. It is our responsibility tho to deal with the consequences, to learn and then move on. This isn’t always easy. But if we change our tale, we can create a new story for ourselves and ultimately a much happier life.
Blessings, G

 

Click on images to see full-sized:

 

Three Pillar ExerciseThree Pillar Exercise by G A Rosenberg

 

Buried SeedBuried Seed by G A Rosenberg

 

From Victim to Creator

One of the fundamental differences between the Victim Orientation and this one [Creator] is where you put your focus of attention…For Victims, the focus is always on what they don’t want: the problems that seem constantly to multiply in their lives. They don’t want the person, condition, or circumstance they consider their Persecutor, and they don’t want the fear that leads to fight, flee or freeze reactions, either. Creators, on the other hand, place their focus on what they do want. Doing this, Creators still face and solve problems in the course of creating outcomes they want, but their focus remains fixed on their ultimate vision.
~ David Emerald

 

I admit it. I have a problem understanding why so many have this need to live in the painful areas of their past reliving over and over again how they were hurt and who hurt them . They play this movie in their minds sometimes for decades after it has ended. Understand please I am not negating how they were hurt nor am I saying that they should ‘just get over it’ I regret the fact that they were hurt so badly that they have given up all agency in their lives to the past hurt and often use it as an excuse to not take responsibility. “I’ve never been able to find a good relationship because my father never loved me enough.” “My first boyfriend hit me and now I can’t trust men””I had this disease when I was younger and people laughed at me and hurt me and even tho it ended years ago, I can’t live a normal life because of the trauma” So much hurt and so much pain still being clung to when life could be so much better for them. All they have to do is find the courage to start a new chapter and rise like the Phoenix from the seeds of the old.
Blessings, G

 

Click on image to see full-sized

 

FractAstraledFracastraled by G A Rosenberg

 

ArrayedArrayed by G A Rosenberg

Quote of the Day – December 23 2012

“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”
― C.G. Jung

 

A friend of mine on Facebook has started a new group. He is encouraging each person who joins to repeat (well type) the mantra “I AM THE NEW DAY”. I find this amazingly empowering. I have written before on my view of self-victimization and being stuck on the moments in the past when we have been hurt either by ourselves or by another. Too often, this results in an inability to move forward. Society seems to reward this behaviour. Our victims get book deals and run the interview circuit. Everyone wants to feel sorry for someone and too often sympathy can become a drug.

 

By my saying this, please do not think that I am discounting ANYONE’S pain. I have cried from the things I’ve heard that friends and family have gone through. When I hear or read about some of the truly creative ways that we have found to be destructive towards each other it hurts. At the same time I try very hard not only to know the pain of the person whom it has been inflicted on but to know the pain of the persecutor also. I would love to build a world where such pain does not exist. Who would like to help? Any ideas?

 

So yes, we have gone through a lot and we may still go through more but do we cling to the pain of the past or do we become something more than a victim, an object of pity not just for others but for ourselves. What do we want to become? How do we heal? I believe these two questions are intimately intertwined.

Blessings, G

 

Click on images to see full-sized

 

Black Light Mandala

Black Light Mandala by G A Rosenberg

 

Page of PentaclesTarot – Page of Pentacles by G A Rosenberg

 

Quote of the Day – April 26 2012

“I can choose either to be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of treasure. It’s all a question of how I view my life.”
― Paulo Coelho, Eleven Minutes

On this one, I’ve chosen long ago. While I may have used by people, never have I been a victim. Many times when I have entered relationships I saw in my mind’s eyes where they would lead, both good and bad. The good was love and fellowship and joy in the presence of another. The bad (relatively speaking) was lessons that I needed to learn or perhaps repeat to drive home the point I had insisted on missing before so even the bad was a win. When the time came to move on, rarely cleanly I left feeling properly devastated but never really victimized by the other. Was I victimized by myself? Perhaps so. It all depended on how badly I needed the lesson, that treasure that Coelho talks about. Are there any treasures greater than increased awareness and increased capacity for love? I don’t believe so. I am grateful for my life and all the people in it, even the ones who have challenged me, perhaps them most of all.
Blessings, G

Click on image to see full-size
Heart of the Fractal by G A Rosenberg

Tarot Card of the Day — November 10 2010

Eight of Swords – Interference

“I never told a victim story about my imprisonment. Instead, I told a transformation story – about how prison changed my outlook, about how I saw that communication, truth, and trust are at the heart of power.
–Fernando Flores

Click on image to see full-size

Eight of Swords- Interference by G A Rosenberg