“No word matters. But man forgets reality and remembers words.”
― Roger Zelazny
It’s amazing how a good story can grab us. Especially when the story is our own. We as individuals or as part of a tribe construct our story out of a combination of things that happened and things that were said and things that we wished we had said and done. Over time we refine our story improving it until it is the one that works best for us at the moment whether in getting reactions out of others or in justifying our own action. As time goes on, it is not the events we remember in clarity but the oft repeated words. We may even tell our story long after it has served its purpose even if in the long run it does us harm. If someone who was present at the actual event remembers it differently (after all they have constructed their own narrative, we may become greatly offended. Where in more judicious moments we may see that a greater truth and value may come out of the combination of the stories, all too often we cling to the narrative we have. People can and have gone to war over these conflicting narratives. Families have been broken and lives destroyed merely because of a slight difference in narrative. Does our story still serve us or have we fallen in thrall to the story allowing it to control our reality and how we view ourselves?
I feel it would behoove us to look at our stories especially in cases of conflicting narratives to be sure that they remain useful to us rather than the means by which we perpetuate dysfunction.
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