“…there ain’t no journey what don’t change you some.”
― David Mitchell
This may be a short entry tonight for once again I have spent the day travelling from west to east and I find myself weary. This is another trip visiting relatives with kids and pets and general merriment. Still every journey should have a purpose and this is a voyage of recharging and empowerment for me. I have the intention of doing only that which brings joy and forsaking the rest and bring that sense of fun back with me to Vancouver.
“Live, travel, adventure, bless, and don’t be sorry.”
― Jack Kerouac
Another trip beckons
A journey of the heart
in which my heart gets left behind
Pain in leaving
but the travel as always is good.
Old friends, old habits
learned a lifetime ago.
The laughter of innocence
amid the heaviness of today.
Still there is awe in the voyage
and my heart will remain
upon my return.
— G A Rosenberg
“Philosophy is like trying to open a safe with a combination lock: each little adjustment of the dials seems to achieve nothing, only when everything is in place does the door open.”
— Ludwig Wittgenstein
Sometimes my life seems like a series of doors. Each one opens and I am faced with new treasures and new challenges to face. The next door will open only when I have faced the challenges and my life has reached a new configuration. This may take minutes or years and sometimes the two may seem interchangeable for time is nothing here but a measure of process. I must meet, love and have conflict with people and must come to certain realizations in order to make it through. Sometimes there are two or more doors waiting for me. Which one opens all depends on how I choose to handle things in the present. Some doors will return, others will disappear forever leaving only a faint afterimage on my soul of the road not traveled. Still there is that in me that enjoys the game and wants to make the most out of every room I’m in. Yet there is that in me that also wishes to find an exit as I walk through the last doorway.
“Self-care is not selfish. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.”
— Eleanor Brownn
Something a bit different tonight. Often when I create art, I feel inspired to write poetry or meditate. My pink crystal picture tonight came with a story or at least the beginnings of one…
The crystal that she held by its thin chain glowed pink and it cast strange shadows on the walls of the room. The crystal was fascinating. It seemed to contain faces within its facets and the faces held as many emotions as the crystal had facets. The faces like the light appeared on the wall. I could hear a strange droning noise. If I listened closely I could almost hear whispered voices. It was as if the faces on the wall were speaking and each one was telling the tale of its life. I heard whispers of pain and joy and longing for an existence that had been denied to them for too long. As I walked towards the face that looked the most benevolent, its voice started supplanting the others so that I could hear it above the din and drone that was going on around me. “My name is Fred Thornton and when I first encountered the gem, I was on a trip to Athens….”
Click on images to see full-sized:”
Shadows Cast by a Glowing Crystal by G A Rosenberg
“No such thing as spare time
no such thing as free time
no such thing as down time
All you have is life time
— Henry Rollins
Each second counts
a lifetime of moments
Yet so many
Does it matter
without the mind
to be present
We add the live to life
with be-ing and will
The clock is ticking
and our lives are our own
if we own them
— G A Rosenberg
“If someone can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in any thought or action, I shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone: the harm is to persist in one’s own self-deception and ignorance.”
— Marcus Aurelius
I love finding out that I’m wrong. All too often I see people fighting for their points of view and being unwilling to face challenges. If I cannot defend my viewpoint on a given subject that means that there is a viewpoint that is better reasoned or more thought out than my own. Which means that either I need to understand my own thoughts better or I need to change my viewpoint to bring it more in line with a greater truth. Which means I have to grow as a person. The new viewpoint may not be right either. Actually considering that the best we can hope for in our lives are closer to closer approximations of reality, the chances are that it is not right. At the moment tho it is closer which means that by adopting it, my outlook has grown. Even better perhaps I can reconcile the two outlooks and gain an even greater understanding. That will never happen tho if I confuse my belief and my understanding with my identity. I hold beliefs. They are not me. At least that’s how I see it now.
“When you are in the middle of a story it isn’t a story at all, but only a confusion; a dark roaring, a blindness, a wreckage of shattered glass and splintered wood; like a house in a whirlwind, or else a boat crushed by the icebergs or swept over the rapids, and all aboard powerless to stop it. It’s only afterwards that it becomes anything like a story at all. When you are telling it, to yourself or to someone else.”
— Margaret Atwood
Sometimes it feels like life becomes a little too dramatic. Those closest to us act in ways that we find difficult to accept. Our jobs and family life are in turmoil and we can’t tell which way is up. One day it may make a good story but at the time it feels like the deepest torment. Those are the times when it becomes necessary to hold on tight and let it go and realize that I will make it through to tell the tale. I can’t see the story’s end all I can see is the next thing necessary to do. So I do that thing and then the next thing and a few steps down the line I have made it through the storm. That is the way I have made it through before and it will work that way into the future. When the path ahead is fogged up, I will focus on what is ahead of me and make it one step at a time. What a story I will have to tell when I have arrived.