“When you are on the dancefloor, there is nothing to do but dance.”
― Umberto Eco
How often do sign up for something such as a relationship, a job or even an outing with friends and then when things get rough we either complain or bail? One of my favourite expressions is “I bought ticket so now we take the ride” tho Umberto Eco says it more elegantly in the above quote. In other words, if I engage in something than I need to take responsibility for how it turns out whether that be good, bad or otherwise. That doesn’t mean staying in a bad situation as much as it means accepting what comes and making informed decisions based on the highest good for all.
“Each man had only one genuine vocation – to find the way to himself….His task was to discover his own destiny – not an arbitrary one – and to live it out wholly and resolutely within himself. Everything else was only a would-be existence, an attempt at evasion, a flight back to the ideals of the masses, conformity and fear of one’s own inwardness.”
― Hermann Hesse
I find it to be the oddest dance
this search for self-discovery
two step forwards one step back
I make a quick recovery
then one step forwards and then back two
spin in place and fro and two
Still there’s progress to be made
meditation, study, prayer
all the screw ups , the lessons learned
another chance to conquer fear
and yet it seems to move so slow
getting caught up in what I think I know.
Yet in this slow frustrating dance
A kind of peace has come to me
If I had never seen my chains
then freedom I would never see
So I’ll continue without slack
this two steps forward, one step back
“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.”
― Maya Angelou
Today I surrender who I’ve been for who I am. Tomorrow I’ll do the same.There is joy in the surrender but also sorrow. There is pain that I’ve grown so accustomed to that it has become a friend. Letting go of it is akin to losing a loved one. I know tho that I’ll be better without it and the scar will be cool. I will sacrifice innocence for inner sense tho I long to regain it. Trust gives way to wariness and finds its way back like waves along the shore. Like so many things tho it is not an on/off binary switch but a dimmer switch with many graduations. I’ve learned who to trust and how much. Thus I’ve gained wisdom which is beautiful tho have lost a stunning naiveté My love also has gained depth and focus and perhaps expansion as well. With luck and an openness to learn, age gives dimensionality. We become less stock actors and more and more ourself. Yet nothing worthwhile comes without a price. So I will mourn my yesterday selves and know that I will join them. Someone looked on in fondness by the tomorrow mes.
Thank you Maya Angelou for incarnating and Blessings on your journey. Your words from time to time have served as a compass for me.
“Have you also learned that secret from the river; that there is no such thing as time?” That the river is everywhere at the same time, at the source and at the mouth, at the waterfall, at the ferry, at the current, in the ocean and in the mountains, everywhere and that the present only exists for it, not the shadow of the past nor the shadow of the future.”
— Hermann Hesse
I see my life as a river flowing
laid out in eternity
existing at once
with currents of memory
connecting moment to moment
To sail along my river
is to understand
the riptides and the doldrums
the gentleness and wildness
and the patterns that exist within
Travel with me for a time
walk along my banks
or skinny dip in my depths
or perhaps just float along
in my embrace
— G A Rosenberg
“One should use common words to say uncommon things”
― Arthur Schopenhauer
One of the qualities that I have been working on in myself is to have the clarity necessary to speak deep truths in a simple way. Understanding is wonderful but if I can’t convey what I understand in a simple way to others than it is next to useless. What’s more if I can’t explain it simply do I fully understand or am I just intellectualizing? In these days of internet connection, knowledge is easy to come by, understanding much less so. It is the difference between having a warehouse full of food and feeding people.
“Facing it, always facing it, that’s the way to get through. Face it.”
― Joseph Conrad
Facing my own ignorance rather than arguing for it.
Facing my own lack of discipline rather than justifying it.
Facing my odd turns of thoughts and accepting them
Facing the things I don’t want to face.
Facing the injustices in front of me rather than decrying those in the world.
Facing my own inaction.
Facing my own joy in hopeless situations
Facing my partner with honesty and an open heart.
Facing my son through good and bad
Facing the sunset.
Facing the young children at play.
Facing the random acts of kindness performed by strangers.
Facing the joy in an old woman’s face watching her grandchildren
Facing lovers walking arm in arm
Facing the animals at play
Facing that their are good things in this world.
Sometimes it is as difficult to face the good as it is the bad. The difference between the two is not a constant but a variable and where the line falls can vary according to both the perceiver and the context in which they are perceived.
“Nothing exists until or unless it is observed. An artist is making something exist by observing it. And his hope for other people is that they will also make it exist by observing it. I call it ‘creative observation.’ Creative viewing.”
― William S. Burroughs
I will enter my mind palace
and work with the star stuff there
I will enter the dark places
and use shadows
I will learn the colours of emotion
and throw them where I will
Lines and curves and little blocks of wood
I’ll use time and thyme and be used in return
People oh yes
beings of all kinds
belong on the screen before me.
For I create what I see
and forget what I’ve known before.
I invent my reality
but then don’t we all?
— G A Rosenberg